Kaiser Island - Ryan Kaiser's Survivor 39: Island of the Idols recaps
Kaiser Island - Island of the Idols
Survivor 39: Island of the Idols Recaps/ analysis

The prize isn't only in the million dollars

Episode 14: The prize isn't only in the million dollars

Published: December 20, 2019

Ryan takes stock of the Island of the Idols winner, the finale and reunion show, passes a final judgment on the season's story, cast, and final five, then looks ahead excitedly to Season 40: Winners at War.

Where are we in the game?

Episode 13: Where are we in the game?

Published: December 14, 2019

After Elaine's heartbreaking boot and the dark cloud of another dispiriting Dan card, Ryan tries to take a fresh look at the remaining five Island of the Idols players, and assess their standing heading into the finale.

Wrecking ball

Episode 12: Wrecking ball

Published: December 6, 2019

Loved ones visit Fiji, but only for the powerful. Noura gives a rant for the ages. An underdog alliance goes up in flames as Dean leaks the plan, and Karishma's ninth life is finally snuffed. And Ryan Kaiser attempts to sift through the wreckage for signs of life.

This bitch bit my finger

Episode 11: This bitch bit my finger

Published: November 30, 2019

As a compromised Survivor season staggers on, Ryan tries to focus on the positive: Lauren's idol-winning bet, Noura somehow selflessly winning immunity, and Karishma's big idol play. Also Detective Dean's half-baked obfuscation.

The answer is no

Episode 10: The answer is no

Published: November 22, 2019

After the previous week's harrowing circumstances, Ryan runs through an episode that tries to pretend nothing major happened. Which dampens any thought of celebrating what would otherwise be exciting events in this one.

Standing up for what was right

Episodes 8 & 9: Standing up for what was right

Published: November 15, 2019

As the once outstanding Island of the Idols season takes a dark, grim turn at the merge, Ryan sets aside the jokes for a week to ponder what went wrong, what needs fixing, and to praise those who stood up for what was right.

You want to pull some crazy shit?

Episode 7: You want to pull some crazy s***?

Published: November 8, 2019

Ryan praises and guides you through a second straight spectacular, character-driven, socially relevant episode of Survivor, which as a bonus also featured abundant flashy gameplay and strategic insights ... almost all of it by women. Plus a salute to Rudy Boesch.

Ain't scared of no fight

Episode 6: Ain't scared of no fight

Published: November 1, 2019

Ryan revisits the high-pressure Tribal that could have gone to rocks, or featured an Aaron flip, but instead deployed a key advantage and an ex-Vokai missing the merge. With lots of juicy stakes, heartfelt 'real talk' conversations, and chicken decapitation reactions along the way.

Orange is dead

Episode 5: Orange is dead

Published: October 26, 2019

Ryan takes a minute to relax, with his face full of sand, reflecting on the state of the game in this interlude of an episode: largely Noura-free (and Island of the Idols-free), lots of Karishma, too much Applebee's, and everyone scrambling to distance themselves from old Lairo.

The Noura TV show

Episode 4: The Noura TV show

Published: October 18, 2019

Ryan is here at this place and time to remind you all that if you live in the present and visualize success, dreams can come true, such as getting to see Noura visit Island of the Idols, then run her tribemates into trees. Also Lairo pulled off another blindside.

A couple steps too far

Episode 3: A couple steps too far

Published: October 11, 2019

Cracks, cuts and covert operations were abundant in the Lairo tribe this week, and Ryan is here to praise some, bury others, and curiously cheer still others? In-dean.

Parvati 2.0

Episode 2: Parvati 2.0

Published: October 4, 2019

Ryan revisits another episode of Island of the Idols where the women did everything: start fires, find idols, win idols, yell at their tribes, fall off ladders, arrange coups, and of course, get voted out. And always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.

What is this place?

Episode 1: What is this place?

Published: September 27, 2019

Come, stare in slack-jawed wonder as Ryan Kaiser replays for you the events of the season premiere of Island of the Idols. Events you have seen before, but will still amaze you in their level of Janet stanning and Idol (mostly Sandra) worship.

Giant heads: The TDT Island of the Idols contestant draft

Pre-season: Giant heads - The TDT Island of the Idols contestant draft

Published: September 23, 2019

The True Dork Times writers (Ben Martell, Dan Otsuki, Pat Ferrucci, Ryan Kaiser, and Jeff Pitman) congregate and try to pick the winner of Survivor: Island of the Idols based on almost zero evidence. But that's no reason to avoid making what are probably ludicrously inaccurate hot takes.

IotI cast assessment

Pre-season: Island of the Idols cast assessment

Published: September 16, 2019

With barely a week and a half left until the premiere, Ryan is eager to get rolling with Island of the Idols, and, armed mostly with their CBS bios, has put together a brisk run-down of which new castaways among the cast may soon have their own giant wooden head statues.

Ryan KaiserRyan Kaiser has been a lifelong fan of Survivor since the show first aired during his days in elementary school, and he plans to one day put his money where his mouth is by competing in the greatest game on Earth. Until that day comes, however, he'll stick to running his mouth here and on Twitter: @Ryan__Kaiser