Kaiser Island - Ryan Kaiser's Survivor 38: Edge of Extinction recaps
Kaiser Island - Edge of Extinction
Survivor 38: Edge of Extinction Recaps/ analysis

Defeat everybody else

Ep. 14: Defeat everybody else

Published: May 18, 2019

Well, it finally happened. Edge of Extinction is finally extinct. So it's time to put a tiny Wardog cap on the season, as Ryan revisits Chris's 5-day march to victory, and the ultimate irrelevance of the 13 episodes that preceded it.

Jury Jeopardy - EoE

Pre-Episode 14: Jury Jeopardy - EoE

Published: May 13, 2019

The True Dork Times writers once again anticipate a Survivor finale by forecasting the jurors' preferences, this time for Edge of Extinction. Wow, sixteen people are still potentially in the game? That's ... a lot.

Not living on the Edge tonight

Ep. 13: Not living on the Edge tonight

Published: May 10, 2019

Ryan revisits an episode that mostly just recycled the usual idol antics, as the finale clock ticked down, and imagines a time better spent: With lots of Reem. Lots and lots of Reem. (Also some Aurora and Lauren, but mostly Reem.)

Thanks for the honeymoon

Ep. 12: Thanks for the honeymoon

Published: May 3, 2019

Ryan recaps a tear-soaked episode of Survivor: Edge of Extinction: From the tear at the bottom of Ron's advantage menu, to the contestants' tears of enduring Probst's talk-show questioning with their loved ones, to the salty splashes on the loved ones in the challenge, to Ryan's own tears at the Reem vs. Wardog showdown at the Edge being cut for time.

It gets harder as you get deeper

Ep. 11: It gets harder as you get deeper

Published: April 26, 2019

It's a somber time, as Ryan reflects on the errant swims, the missed rings, the mud baths, the rice wars, and cheeseries that led to the Wardog's slipping to Extinction. Although at least there was a lot of Reem and Kelley to soften the blow.

Holy ___, Wardog

Ep. 10: Holy ___, Wardog

Published: April 19, 2019

Ryan Kaiser has survived a mountain of pizza and dodged falling balls to bring you this grim report of two returnees felled in a single episode, all thanks to ... dammit, Wardog.

My spidey sense says it's me

Ep. 9: My spidey sense says it's me

Published: April 12, 2019

Amidst the turbulent waters of Tribal Council, one calm, half-idol-wielding chap provides the landing lap for people jumping ship. No, it's not Wardog. Ryan navigates the all-Tribal episode, and recaps its high points and low blows, like hiding the person who has (allegedly) been running the show.

Civil war

Ep. 8: Civil war

Published: April 5, 2019

Ryan takes stock (stake? steak?) of the state of the game after the Kama kollapse, and revels in the no-longer-purple reveals of Aurora and Julia as power players, and Wardog as a number-crunching, ____-logic-playing, actual puppetmaster.

Let's f***ing do it

Ep. 7: Let's f***ing do it

Published: March 29, 2019

Ryan revisits the highs and lows and expletives and exits of the Extinction reveal and return, and the lows and whoas and oh nos of the rest of the Edge of Extinction merge episode.

Everything's a gamble

Eps. 5-6: Everything's a gamble

Published: March 23, 2019

As the pre-merge fast-forwards through its final two hours, Ryan pauses to mourn Aubry's blindside, appreciate the Extinction chaos, remark on Lesu's losing and Joe's winning ways, and take a worried peek ahead at the big Extinction reveal and return.

The Cleveland Browns of tribes

Ep.4: The Cleveland Browns of tribes

Published: March 15, 2019

Everything is different and yet pretty much the same, as Ryan surveys the aftermath of the tribe swap: Some madness, some sadness, and some acceptance that maybe The Wardog is running this asylum, after all.

She's lost her rocker

Ep.3: She's lost her rocker

Published: March 8, 2019

If you were hoping Ryan wouldn't be able to get through his Episode 3 recap of Edge of Extinction without addressing the giant chicken in the room, you're in cluck. (Not sorry. Totally Wentworth it.)

I would vote me out

Ep.2: I would vote me out

Published: March 1, 2019

Revisit the revelry (also the recriminations?) of Episode 2 with Ryan, who loved Reem on Redemption, er, Extinction, and mostly tolerated the rest of the episode's idol talk and returnee-hating.

This old lady can kill it

Ep.1: This old lady can kill it

Published: February 23, 2019

With a (mostly) new cast and a new twist, there's a lot for Ryan to recap, from the Joes to the cobras to the reeming. But don't worry, Reem could extend her life on this show. Who will join the Debbie-Natalie pantheon this season? Could it be... clothes?

The TDT EoE contestant draft

Pre-season: The TDT EoE contestant draft

Published: February 17, 2019

As the new season nears the True Dork Times writers (Ben Martel1, Dan Otsuki, Pat Ferrucci, Ryan Kaiser, and Jeff Pitman) gather to draft fantasy teams of three players. Whose prediction skills will drive their team to extinction? Whose prognostication will give them an edge and a victory?

EoE cast assessment

Pre-season: Edge of Extinction cast assessment

Published: February 4, 2019

Ryan runs through his first impressions of the Edge of Extinction cast, then comes up with an approximate bootlist. Which, in the context of a poorly explained brand-new twist, may not end up meaning much. But it's here!

Ryan KaiserRyan Kaiser has been a lifelong fan of Survivor since the show first aired during his days in elementary school, and he plans to one day put his money where his mouth is by competing in the greatest game on Earth. Until that day comes, however, he'll stick to running his mouth here and on Twitter: @Ryan__Kaiser