Which TV engineering geek show is right for me?

It's a question that has plagued mankind since the dawn of time:
Which TV engineering geek show is right for me?

By Sterling Engine
True Dork Times Squidial Pursuits Editor

First there was Battlebots, on of all places, Comedy Central. Around the same time, TLC tried its reality/geek hand with Junkyard Wars. After that failed to win over the coveted MTV demographic, TLC tried again with the carbon-copy show Robotica. Together, there's more fun than a combined Harvey Mudd - Caltech - MIT study session. What breathing human could possibly resist?

Battlebots
(Comedy Central)

Robotica (TLC)

Junkyard Wars (TLC)

What's the host-age situation?
Standard sportscaster style. Feels uncomfortably like a Sportscenter audition tape. Bil Dwyer (left) adds the necessary facial hair, bleach job and enthusiasm to give the proceedings a vaguely WWF air. NFL pro/lawyer/broadcaster Tim Green provides the blow-by-blow.
You're stuck with as many minutes as you can take of Ahmet Zappa.
Fresh off of the immensely unpopular Happy Hour on USA, Ahmet seems determined to become the new Pauly Shore - the host who tries really, really hard to be annoying, and frequently succeeds.
A split decision. On the one hand, you have the loud, obtrusive George Gray (left), who appears to be aiming for Ahmet-lite territory. On the other, there's creator/producer/host Cathy Rogers, who is as down to earth and, well, British, as Grey is not.

Howzabout the format? Like a boxing match. Three weight divisions and one ring. Albeit a ring with various spontaneously-appearing cutting/impaling hazards. More like a triathlon, both for the contestants and the viewers. Three contests for each group, including a race, obstacle courses, and a final head-to-head battle. All the padding of NBC Olympics coverage and Survivor finales, rolled into one! Two teams compete to build some sort of mechanical device (from cannons to rockets to diving helmets), then test it out. Some pretty cool-looking stuff gets made, and, frequently, fired.

Are there babe interviewers? Yup. This may be the closest some of the contestants have ever come to a woman. Plus, there's Bill Nye the Science Guy! (bonus points). Yes, indeedy. One used to be on Baywatch, or (ahem) so we're told. As far as we can tell, Rogers has never appeared on Baywatch. But she's not unattractive.

Do the contestants get to wear snappy jumpsuit-coverall type outfits? If they so desire. Oh yeah. Each group gets their own special color, too! Just like, well, NASCAR. They must be so proud. Color-coordinated coveralls may be required for all shows on TLC.

What's the lifespan of the show? We think it will eventually become obvious that one particular design strategy in invincible, which will drop the interest value. It's fairly entertaining to see the evolutionary battle between weaponry and defense at the moment, though. Hard to say. Given (1) that it's a carbon copy of Battlebots, and (2) Ahmet Zappa is involved, one more season is probably pushing it. Unlike the other two shows, every week has a different challenge on Junkyard Wars, which is why it's already moving into season five. No reason to stop there, either.

Would this show make a good video game? Yes, especially if you get to design your own bots. The whole concept is, essentially, a live-action video game. Despite the show's watchability problems, it would probably make the best video game, given the array of tests you can put your bot through. Just leave Ahmet off the soundtrack, please. Probably not. Too much variety.

This show is right for me if... You like to watch robots run into, beat and maim each other. (And who doesn't?) You have a very long attention span, and/or are a relative of the contestants or Ahmet Zappa. You're over 30, and you like to tinker with welding supplies, eventually ending up with something that may explode.

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	Battlebots (Comedy Central)	Robotica (TLC)	Junkyard Wars (TLC)
What's the host-age situation?	Standard sportscaster style. Feels uncomfortably like a Sportscenter audition tape. Bil Dwyer (left) adds the necessary facial hair, bleach job and enthusiasm to give the proceedings a vaguely WWF air. NFL pro/lawyer/broadcaster Tim Green provides the blow-by-blow.	You're stuck with as many minutes as you can take of Ahmet Zappa. Fresh off of the immensely unpopular Happy Hour on USA, Ahmet seems determined to become the new Pauly Shore - the host who tries really, really hard to be annoying, and frequently succeeds.	A split decision. On the one hand, you have the loud, obtrusive George Gray (left), who appears to be aiming for Ahmet-lite territory. On the other, there's creator/producer/host Cathy Rogers, who is as down to earth and, well, British, as Grey is not.
Howzabout the format?	Like a boxing match. Three weight divisions and one ring. Albeit a ring with various spontaneously-appearing cutting/impaling hazards.	More like a triathlon, both for the contestants and the viewers. Three contests for each group, including a race, obstacle courses, and a final head-to-head battle. All the padding of NBC Olympics coverage and Survivor finales, rolled into one!	Two teams compete to build some sort of mechanical device (from cannons to rockets to diving helmets), then test it out. Some pretty cool-looking stuff gets made, and, frequently, fired.
Are there babe interviewers?	Yup. This may be the closest some of the contestants have ever come to a woman. Plus, there's Bill Nye the Science Guy! (bonus points).	Yes, indeedy. One used to be on Baywatch, or (ahem) so we're told.	As far as we can tell, Rogers has never appeared on Baywatch. But she's not unattractive.
Do the contestants get to wear snappy jumpsuit-coverall type outfits?	If they so desire.	Oh yeah. Each group gets their own special color, too! Just like, well, NASCAR. They must be so proud.	Color-coordinated coveralls may be required for all shows on TLC.
What's the lifespan of the show?	We think it will eventually become obvious that one particular design strategy in invincible, which will drop the interest value. It's fairly entertaining to see the evolutionary battle between weaponry and defense at the moment, though.	Hard to say. Given (1) that it's a carbon copy of Battlebots, and (2) Ahmet Zappa is involved, one more season is probably pushing it.	Unlike the other two shows, every week has a different challenge on Junkyard Wars, which is why it's already moving into season five. No reason to stop there, either.
Would this show make a good video game?	Yes, especially if you get to design your own bots. The whole concept is, essentially, a live-action video game.	Despite the show's watchability problems, it would probably make the best video game, given the array of tests you can put your bot through. Just leave Ahmet off the soundtrack, please.	Probably not. Too much variety.
This show is right for me if...	You like to watch robots run into, beat and maim each other. (And who doesn't?)	You have a very long attention span, and/or are a relative of the contestants or Ahmet Zappa.	You're over 30, and you like to tinker with welding supplies, eventually ending up with something that may explode.