E-mail your suggestions to: truedorktimes@truedorktimes.com if you think we missed something.

1. The sudden avalanche of Bud Light commercials featuring the "it's not so bad" guy
Ahem.  The first one was funny, mainly because it was surprising, and went against beer-commercial logic.  Twenty-seven new variations on this theme are to funny as, well, the last six seasons of Home Improvement were to enjoyable entertainment.

2. CBS's patriotic effort to delay the Emmys until sweeps month
Was there some point at which we cared to sit through three hours of self-congratulatory back-slapping, culminating in the annual inauguration of Kelsey Grammer as God's gift to comedic acting?  We thought not.

3. Iron Chef: USA
Okay, we'll give them that, of all our pantheon of faded B-rate actors, William Shatner makes a fairly good approximation of Chairman Kaga's insanity.  But we think they're missing the point here - the majority of the fun with Iron Chef is that it's Japanese, features bizarre food you'd never see here, and the fact that, no matter how hard they work, the challenger always has to overcome Japanese anti-democratic traditions of favoring prestige over quality.  Somehow we don't see that happening here.  Although being in Vegas is a step toward the prestige-over-quality part.

4. The proliferation of tickers at the bottom of CNN, Headline News, Fox News, and MSNBC's screens
Every so often, we like to flip over to one of these channels and say "Holy crap! The U.S. is bombing Afghanistan?  Thank God we got here in time to find out!"

5. New Order releases a new album
Featuring a guest appearance by Billy Corgan.