Below are some real-life emails from real-life readers.  We thought we had cornered the market on cleverly bitter prose, at least until we heard from these folks. If you have something to share, as always, you can contact us at:

"Nice looking broads"

But where are the nudie shots??
I expect to see some skin in a rag with the word "DORK" in it.
No love-jugs, no shoobie-doobies.  Feh!
I'm gone--
Yours disgustedly,

-Ian  from Canada.
(nudity is legal here!)

Editor responds:  Thanks for the valuable input, Ian.  Yes, we've considered adding porn to the site, to drive up readership.  Why do you think newspapers print all those lingerie ads in the front section?  Had you been reading back in January, in fact, you would have noticed that we slip in a few tasteful semi-nudes every now and then.  But you're right: who are we to ignore this important and profitable marketing tool?

So without further ado, here's an extra-special, True Dork Times-endorsed skin shot.  For adults only! - Ed.

"A comment"

Vapid, puerile codswallop.  I'll be back regularly.  That is, unless, as I suspect will be the case, and for reasons known best to
your-delusions-of-adequacy-selves, you just can't get it up to continue.  In which case, I look forward to a really dismal 404.

-Allan in the Carolinas.

Editor responds:  Thanks for the kind words, Allan.  While we continually strive for adequacy, we have no delusions that we can ever actually attain it within our lifetimes.  Don't worry, we'll continue to roll out the puerility every month until we get sick of it. Or at least moreso than we already are. -Ed.